Answering Every Relationship Question Ever

Simeon: Partner has problems with your girl best friends. And Zeke, what would you in that problem? Have you in a relationship and you got a girl best friend? And like your girlfriend that girl best friend? You know, they clash a little bit.

Zeke:You got to see where that insecurity coming from it could be that they’d be cheated on by they see like a pattern that they’ve been cheated on by somebody like there’s always a person that you’re not supposed to worry about. Worry about them. 

[Music]

Zeke:I like to welcome, everyone, to another episode of the Let’s Gather Podcast. I’m your host Zeke in this episode my friend Simeon returning to talk about relationships answering every relationship question ever asked. I would like a warning that we are not relationship experts. And we cannot speak on all relationships and situations. I like to give a content warning for any strong language used in this episode. I hope you have a nice day and enjoy the show. 

Simeon: Good. Yeah, that’s what that’s one of the topics I want to talk about in this podcast. I really should just relationships in general. Yeah. Because I I’m in my currently my girlfriend her name is Brittany McKnight. She is a PCT patient care technician. They she just basically helps um disabled, elderly COVID patients at Gaylord Hospital in Connecticut been together for almost a year, almost a year. So it is going good. It’s crazy that I just, you know, I started a relationship with her a couple of months ago. And like a lot of people have been asking me um you know, how are you guys doing it? Cuz I live in New York, she lives in Connecticut. I do. I’m going to be a warehouse manager at Amazon she’s going to be in the medical field. I’m Going to be a PA. How you guys gonna like work that out stuff? Honestly, it’s it’s a lot. But now we we communicate and we talk like every day. So every day we we figure it out. We just get better. So these are some questions that I have here that I’m a answer about relationship like a lot of relationship. Questions. A lot of people ask me, so I could give it up to the general public. So I can help other people in their relationships as well.

Zeke:Yes, I am not an expert. Um in relationships. Yeah. I’ve been working my whole life.

Simeon: Absolutely. So it’s like, I mean, no, nobody’s at first expert. You get in it and you start learning things. You look at other people and their relationships and what they do and try to in cooperating to what, you guys do? Like a model relationship that like, I talk to Brittany about all the time about is Steph Curry and Ayesha Curry. Like I just love their relationship. That’s like, awesome. I guess so like, pure and wholesome. I know people who hate on me. I just love It’s nice

Zeke:That’s her high school sweethearts right there. Yeah. She picked the right one.

Simeon: Right. So, but I’m gonna see if I go find something real quick. [Sounds]. So like, first question. I want to ask is one of them. How do you make a long distance relationship work? All right. Well, I say I like to think that you know, love and be there must be frozen. Okay. My bad, because I’m cycling through Yeah, zoom. And like, Yeah, because my sister if I didn’t know, my sister’s on my laptop, so I can’t do anything. Cuz I’m on my phone right now. Shoutout to Samsung got the S 21. With text ads. So you know, it’s nice. Samsung gang Android gang. My son Zeke got the headset. So yeah, yeah. Yeah, here we go.

Zeke:[inaudible].

Simeon: But yeah, how to how do we make you know, long distance relationship work. So I say I like to think that love and distance don’t really correlate with each other. Unless unless the person that you love is like, on Mars, you know, like, if that girl or guy you love is mad mad, like, if you’re in New York and it goes in India, or Pakistan or Australia, then and you know, it might be a little problem that’s like, nearly 20 hours away or something like, so want to see you up the book, months in advance. Um, but you know, if somebody is like, close to where you live in close proximity, like New Jersey, Philly, Connecticut, you know, then you can make that work that that’s fine because, you know, they’re right there a bus ride or train ride two to three hours in a car as far as I have to think loving this is not don’t correlate because a lot of people think that when you know, long distance relationship, that gives you more incentive to cheat. Alright, um, I don’t really think that’s the case. Because I could my girlfriend could be like, in Brooklyn, I live in Queens, She could live in Brooklyn, and still cheat um you know, she could be across the street and still cheat um you know, it doesn’t matter where she is, cheating could still happen or ideally should still have problems even the person who love is still close by it just matter on how much you love that person that they reciprocate, that same love back to you. Now, if that person again is in like, Australia, you know, that then you got a case.

Zeke:In the fourth dimension you decide,  

Simeon: You right, you know? Like, if that person is on Jupiter’s, then you got case, if they far far, far, far away,

Zeke:Jupiter that’s years. 

Simeon: Yeah. Then you’ve you got a problem.

Zeke:I’m 23 right now, the next time I’m a see you is when I’m 32.

Simeon: Honestly, the first time you see a girl is in like five years. You see on the phone, you’re like, oh, this is what you look like interesting. I see a little wrinkle in your face. That wasn’t on the picture. So also, make sure you communicate with each other. If I was gonna do, okay, make sure you can give each other before and during the relationship. A lot of relationships don’t really work because the communication is not there. Um, a lot of people break up because a lack of communication. Like you guys are arguing all the time can never be on the same page. You think she’s mad at this when she’s actually mad at that? Vice versa. You know, you guys don’t really talk much don’t have really, a lot of deep conversations. Don’t get to know each other. Um, excuse me. I’ve actually finished eating breakfast and drink a smoothie. Yes, I’m working like crazy right now trying to hide it, me my girl have been talking to each other for about four years. Before we even started our relationship. We’ve been talking since the beginning of college until senior year. Like we just want to know each other more deeply what each other wants, you know, if if we got a relationship and, you know, she lives in Connecticut, I live in New York, how’s it gonna work out? We make time to see each other, you know, just stuff like that we talked about. And also if we, as all relationships will, you know, you guys will have some disagreements. If we get in disagreement, you know, the typical move be don’t talk to me. I’m out and leaving, hang up the phone and leave for like a day and come back. Or they will be like, yo, okay, well, what were you mad at? What did I do? Or Okay, I know. I know something happened, you know, seeming like yourself like what’s up? So if you guys just talk it out. The relationship will grow and be better. And it’ll make you know disagreements. And all arguments and fights you know, just dissipate just go away eventually. A bond you as a couple just communicating to people People really don’t. They don’t know what to say, or you know how to say. It takes practice, it takes time. So just tell me, let’s just start from somewhere, rather not not start at all. And lastly, make time to see each other. I these are the three things again, for how do you make a long distance relationship work? Make time to see each other. So I mean, me and my girl, we both are focused on our career. She’s gonna be in the medical field, I’m going to be in the business world. Um, how are we going to see each other because our time, the time we work is different. Because I work for days she works. Now, no randomly, it’s like, every month, they give her a new schedule. So it’s not it’s not set, it’s not fixed. So how do I go around, you know, the schedule differences and trying to see her? And so far I have, because I’m not working. But when work does start, and you’re both working, and how do you see each other. Just try to find a day where you guys are available. It could be a day, two days, three days. And just either you make the sacrifice and go to her or she makes a sacrifice and go to you some way when you get your how to meet up somehow. We both make the sacrifice big sacrifice and meet up in the middle and I go just go to like, you know, Manhattan or Bronx. Hang out, show spend some quality time together. And then when that’s over, go back home and just focus on yourself. So, long distance relationships are good in a way that when you’re not together, it gives you more time to focus on yourself in what you want to do with your career. Your future. Like for me, I’m going to be working Amazon, I’m going to the gym um play ball. I’m getting my car soon. I’m going to be chilling my boys, you know, have some type of social life even though, right? I can’t really. And for her she’s going to do the same focus on her career, go to school PA school. Get that degree make that money. Give me that money, I’m playing. Yeah, you know, she take care of me, she’ll go home. Now, but then when you guys when you guys are apart, and you focus on yourself, and when you’re together, then you know, you just you just wait that person so anything else around you just don’t really matter. So that’s, that’s my pointers on like, how do you make a long distance relationship work? Um, for those who out there are in one. And, you know, it might be going down. These are not always you. For those who are about a BM one. Take E to these tips. For those who aren’t then against those take these tips because I think distance and relationship are not distance and love are not don’t correlate. Unless she’s in you know, Mexico. 

Zeke:Mexico not that far.

Simeon: Or Cancún. Ya know, it’s like, how long does that go from six hours?

Zeke:Just drop down. Takes like a day to , Florida so probably a couple of days.

Simeon: All right, basically. Yeah. These couple days. Yeah. That’s that’s one question that you’ve answered. She’s have a whole list of questions. Yeah. Oh, my goodness. Some of these questions my friend or friends have been asking me for a past couple of months.

Zeke:I need a I need an outlet to tell yall.

Simeon: Yeah, honestly, ask because it’s some of these questions are like common questions, you know, like, how do you okay, does insecurity ruin a relationship, you know? Friendship over girlfriend, like how you defer the two what if your girlfriend doesn’t like you going out all the time. But if you have, you know, trust issues with your partner, and right they say, yeah, like they say, oh, I’m at work bae, and they not at work, you’re probably at the club or something, they probably at the park at a bars, um, I know, those are all the common issues that like a lot of people go through in relationship. And I just want to, like, find some way to like, give my opinion, obviously, it’s my opinions about like, you know, I’m not a doctor relationship, you know, that even existed. I don’t have a PhD in love. But is it but but I am I am learning a lot. And a lot of people look up to my relationship with me and Brittany. Like my friends, my family, especially my family, because my family is huge. And other people that I just meet, they look up to us a lot. Even though I don’t really post a lot of pictures on Instagram, it’s on Snapchat that I posted. So, you know, I just try to be that beacon of hope and, and help to people who need it. Relationship wise and also, you know, life in general. Um, I guess I just go down the list.

Zeke:Right? Yeah.

Simeon: Okay, um, let’s see, we got one. What if your partner has problems with you, girl best friends? What would you do? No problem. Let’s do this. You should. And you got a girl best friend. And like your girlfriend, that girl best friend? No, they clash a little bit.

Zeke:Yeah, see, when insecurity comes before it could be that they’ve been cheated on by they see, like a pattern that they’ve been on by somebody. Like, there’s always a person that you’re not supposed to worry about. Not worry about them. So they see the pattern. And then there’s like, hey, or it could be that the person just as a security in general does like everybody and I want to control the situations. So yeah,  (inaudible) also gives me a whole misunderstanding. Like this person. I mean, this person, we just friends, we’ve been friends forever. And you’re just like, somebody who has my back. I had their back. And then you’re like versus a girlfriend now. Okay, cool. This is what the person is. Pretty sure this person has no interest in me. They’d be like, how many years? At a certin point you have to say something.

Simeon: Right. Right.

Zeke:And then within the insecurity then you got to see if it’s even worth to be invested. Now because that person like your girl bestfriend, that way as well as well um what you call it. First thing is not just knew about other females or women in general. You decide, okay, this isn’t a situation for me at the moment. It’s not to the one or the other, just seeing what the root whats the root of the situation.

Simeon: All right, Beethoven right there. Mozart, in the whole orchestra, like so. They’re basically basically what you just said. My answer to this will be like an answer to almost every question. Just communicate. You know, if if, if you only sugar sugar, right? Actually. This will be easy. No, Mambo distinction, the Bollywood so I’m in relationship the ocean right? Oh, actually, no. I mean, no relationship. I’m in a relationship with teakwood right. I mean, Tika we hit it off. You know, we know she’s smelling good, you know, you know, and then I got my best friend. Clean Slate. been best friends for a long time. You know, me and Queensway hang out on occasion some time. And teak was like, you’re approaching me together. Now you trying to do something about clean slate that you like, no, this is this about clean slate that you like, I don’t have, like, what’s going on? That’s what insecurity coming Because teakwood believes that no clean slate, you probably attracted a clean slate clean slate probably is something that you don’t have. Well, maybe you guys gel better. Or maybe you just don’t like teak wood anymore. When are you trying to find somebody else? So my answer will be if they don’t get bolted on don’t clash, right? If teakwood feels offended by clean slate or vice versa, when you communicate, just talk to first talk to your girlfriend and see what happened. What’s bugging you? And how can you fix it? And luckily, if a girl doesn’t tell you to cut her off, she’ll probably be like, I don’t like the way you’re you’re acting around clean slate, you know change it like you’re acting different around her then you always mean are you behaving different? or hurting all with me? Um, it seeing any kind of give me the vibe that you like her more than you like me? So then you you reassure her reassurance. Oh my god. You see, they should have made a class in college called relationships is something where you just teach relationships. Why not even do that? I have no idea. I’m reassurance is so key in a relationship. Men don’t know that. And I’ve been trying to tell my friends. Some men don’t know that. Girls need to be reassured constantly. You know, like, we have to keep telling them. Hey, you’re beautiful, you’re gorgeous. We love you know. Just to make them feel beautiful and make them feel secure. Like you don’t want to give off the vibe that you might be losing interest in her or you might be losing feelings. Because that’s where your insecurities arise. So that’s where reassurance is like key and everything. So, man, we got to do a better job of reassuring our girlfriend if you have one or reassuring you know the person you’re talking to so then you talk to ocean sleep. You let your ocean say it was good, bro like Nino we need to stop talking like like wavy talking. We talk a little too fruity. You know you’d be hitting hitting my phone with the yoke you don’t want to You look so good. And especially you thought that um, I mean if it goes that far then you need to tell them to stop it but if it’s just a regular friendship tell that person that hey, I don’t like I was hanging out so often. Cuz I when you tell ocean slate, when you explain Ocean State, how you how to explain this. Because I want to say that don’t say it’s to girls idea. It’s not your girl’s fault is getting your mind to tell that person to chill. Say that you because a girl is gonna feel like it’s her fault that you’re ruining a friendship. Right? It has to be on you. Do you really want to make your girlfriend feel better? If you do, then you be like, Hey, friend, hey, ocean slate. Obviously, hey, ocean slate, let’s calm down on the the talk and you know, the hanging out. Like we could still do that. But not to the full extent that we’ve been doing it for the past month. On the same because I look at my call logs. And it’s it’s you, it’s you. And then it’s my girl and then as you and as maga like, you know when you chill that out. So that’s that’s how you would, you know, fix that problem. Now if you go for tells you to cut her off, then that’s another problem. Well, the answer to that. I have no idea.

Zeke:I think it also depends on the nation like a romantic relationship versus a friendship. Right how people arrange true a lot of times I feel that people do the um kike progression, like, you start with all these are like, strangers to you, how do you progress into a relationship? And then I feel like you get to water we’ve all massively relate on (inaudible) or attracted to somebody, but not be sensitive. And then you because of the way that we were met in chapter two does that there’s a word that I show us that allows you to understand those, those two things to be both be true.

Simeon: Yep. I believe that’s another question I have. actually wait nothing for. You gonna be editing anything?

Zeke:Oh, God, no.(inuadible)

Simeon: That’s because my thing freezes. And it’s I just you see me smiling. Okay. Second question, does insecurity ruin wait didn’t I just say, Well, I know you probably ready to answer this insecurity ruin. relationships. Damn, does it?

Zeke:I mean, if it doesn’t get addressed, yeah. Because if you’re insecure, that means something is bothering you. And then, and then either party, man, woman, men, men want a woman it could be you start thinking like, you start making the story up in your head of what’s going on? And then you start acting on those fancies. You could be right? You also could be wrong. It could be halfway.

Simeon: Damn, I just said everything I was about to say. Keep going, keep going.

Zeke:I’m actually watching people. Like, I’m not in a relationship. But I’m just like, half the things. Because I was  on a different podcast with like, Hamid and Gemise Keep The Conversation Going. Are black men trash? And like one of the questions is like, the black man, like lose woman’s trust after they get it. There’s like, a lot of times people aren’t speaking before they get in relationship. They just like this person is attractive. And then they fall into a relationship like while we’re hanging on hanging out a long time. What are we? 

Simeon: Oh, my God, you didn’t find him attractive a month and then you’re like, oh, what are me? Honestly, I don’t know.

Zeke:We are fighting dreamers. I don’t know.

Simeon: What are we? That’s funny. I kind of question What does insecurity when Oh, he should? Yeah, basically just answered it. My. My plan was, and the very what you just said, if it doesn’t get addressed, then yeah, I can. Um, if let’s go back to this situation again. Take one and clean slate. This is my girlfriend, by the way. Take one on so sweet. And clean slate clean slate is my my best friend who’s a female, right? But this question, I’m gonna keep clean slate out of it. So we’re gonna have my girlfriend teakwood does insecurity ruin our relationship? If not addressed? It can? Because that girl as Zeke said 10,000 thoughts are going to go into her head in a minute. Like, why is he not hanging out with me? Like, he doesn’t say I look beautiful anymore. Like, you know, he doesn’t kiss me hug me or do any of this that you used to do in the past? And then she’s gonna start jumping to conclusions. Thinking this that in a third. And eventually, you’re not realizing what the hell’s going on your relationship. She’s all hit you with that baby. We need to talk. And you can be like, my mama. And she’s gonna explain everything and you know, she leaves and he’ll be like, what? I thought we were good. Bro. When you talk to you, girl um my for that today. So that one just just just talked about, or just set up like what do you call it? Bi weekly or monthly check ins. I know. Important to check in was like in college we do check ins for like, like in SEEK, I think we did check ins and talk to your counselors on. I’m like, why I’m doing a checking for this is mad stupid. And I realize you low key need a check in. I’m just checking when she goes see how she’s doing. How’s relationship going like, Hey, babe. You know, are you feeling good? Am I doing anything wrong? Do I need to improve on anything? How am I as a boyfriend? You know what? I think you need to do this. I don’t like when you do that. Um, I feel like we need more time together. And I just talk and try to work it out. Again, it’s going to take some time because the first time you try to talk with her it might not come out as planned. But if you keep talking and you’ll eventually get to a conclusion.

Zeke:Do a check in like I broke a arm, since when? (inaudible)

Simeon: Right? Third question this one’s debatable was what if your girlfriend doesn’t like you going out? Now what does that mean going out? Like that’s very vague let’s say she doesn’t like you going out to clubs and parties. Then what you do?

Zeke:You probably go back to like the one with our own best friend but I was so put what they perceive. He always said to me like girls night out versus guys night out and the guy that I forgot my Bible you like it depends on how you are at a party. People a pirate by yourself hire you at a party. Do you get job? Do you do things stupid things when you’re drunk? And then a cycle? Also, who your friends? And how do your friends influence you personally by yourself? Because you might not because you’ve cuz a lot of we have friends. And a lot of things we did houses like go over our head because we’ve spent the years like, we got close to them. And then somebody outside party can see the negativity that’s happening. And then because a lot of times you just go with the flow of like, Oh, this person has actually been trying to like harm or like their diet what that is like, when you go out? Also, are you trying to go out? We are planning something ahead of time. And they instead they go out they have already have an argument and then you go out so you decided to kind of see what’s like the pattern. 

Simeon: Alright. 

Zeke:So now I think you’re

Simeon: Nah keep going.

Zeke:A lot of thing go into it, then both parties could be wrong. Like everything. This is two sides to everything. Like left, right and then again the middle.

Simeon: Alright, so yeah, right and right again. She’s wrong, bro. What’s going on? Like levar ball never loss. But um, yeah. Basically, it depends on a lot of things. Again, if people see me doing this, like, fixing my earbuds for some reason, it’s like not staining, my hair keeps falling out. So I gotta keep adjusting every second. And like, people wear glasses. I don’t know if you ever do this, but you have to scratch your nose every second and do this and your glasses. It’s something I do like 24 seven. But again, you hit the nail on the head. So wanted depends on where are you going? If you go to a party or a club, you know, the environment, the atmosphere, you know what you’re about to get into, like a loner.

Zeke:There’s also people who like the party goes like if I have a party to do with my friends. None of them are charged with anything. I’m just like, I’m here because they’re here.

Simeon: All right. Not yet, honestly. Sure. Yeah, depends where you go. And then when you’re there, how do you act? Like, if I go to a club? Oh, let’s go back. So it depends on where you go, right? If you go to bar your club, then you know what you know what you’re about to get into. But if you go into like a restaurant, or you know, a movie shows a movie theater, movie theater, or you know, an activity like rock climbing or something, or bowling, that’s fine. That’s fine. You guys could work that out. Like, you know, hey, we’re gonna go bowling. Serious. But if you go to the club, or a party, you know what you’re about to do? You know? And you know how you act. Like if you start chugging now shots, and you know, smoke Yeah, hi, sniffle and coke or something. You know, you just go back while you’re popping some pills some, then you got a problem. Because I don’t think I will like anybody doing that. But if you like toning down a little bit, and you take some shots, you get a little drunk. Because there’s different levels to getting to enjoy enjoying yourself at a party. Because you can really go all out and do what I just said, Get all the pills and all that stuff. You could go down a little bit and be like, you know, just having fun, just chillin. I could be like, all the way down just just chill and you just vibing don’t ever go all the way talk. Don’t Don’t be stupid in the middle to the bottom low is cool. You just find gentlemen. You do play some music, you’re dancing. That’s fine. But if you just get too drunk and you go to a girl and you just I’m making you know flirting or making out with her and you got a problem. It also depends on if the people around you to friends. I kind of entice you to do it. You know like if she can if you’re in relationship and you know you’re drunk. And you’re in this you’re you’re like a little corner just dancing. And by yourself or something and your friends come to a yoga girl right there she she looking at you nasaan it you like now genre in the corner by myself I can also rotten dead eyes staring at you. I’ll be glad if they like persuade to go to come on me then. They you know, those guys only you know, respect the relationship you have with your girl to that extent. Um so at parties this way you kind of see where your real friends are. Because if you’re in a relationship and you see a side by deficit, if you’re in a relationship, and your friends want you to go dance on somebody else, that’s not your girl. That’s a little problem. But if you’re drunk and you’re gonna go dance on them and your friends tell you not to then those are those are some Aone Bros. He got there. And also I don’t I got to touch on this point. If if you go have fun with a girl. So if you had a party you love drawing, can you buy a phone a girl? And your boys be like, you know, I will see you. Yeah, then then you know that a one boys? You know, I I don’t support that. I don’t support that, oh, I don’t know if it does happen as your boys. But again, I don’t support that I don’t support.

Zeke:But it can’t happen. It also depends on how when you start going out if you go out before the relationship things if you do, or cyber dominates, then that could be like a signal for you that something’s wrong on your end that you’re trying to say something. And there’s also a lot of times people forget that when you get into relationship. You’re still two individuals that you guys still have to like all operate as their own person.

Simeon: So when you, what do you mean by that?

Zeke:Like, a lot of times people have this idea. So like you like, you see a couple that you actually were like they had to be attached to the hip at all times. And they can’t ble like be like one without the other. Like, what happened to like you see a person a worse person be like, they’re not like their own person, like, all your interests have their lines at all times. They’re like, hey, interested, but like hobbies, stuff like that. But (inaudible) two totally different things. I remember Kevonstage was talking about him and his wife. They got to the point where they go order different food for like, doordash I don’t have to get the same meal. Which is like, Yeah, sometimes somebody wants steak somebody wants lobster. You don’t have to have the same meal. They’re being delivered to you by okay, cool. I say what you want. You said what I want, and then we can go from there.

Simeon: I agree. I might just take this thing off. Can you can you hear me? Yeah. Okay, okay. I’m gonna just take this off is because I just keep doing this because they keep coming out. To get me to Airbus’s something headphones. 

Zeke:Your girl your girl, hey, you like what’s the question? How you answer the question? Aight cool.

Simeon: Yeah.

Zeke:I’m watching you.

Simeon: Okay, the next one. Friendship over girlfriend. Friendship over relationship. relationship will refresh at least one do you value more? Ah, damn,

Zeke:I’m a person who always looked for was that was going to be the best for me. And was ever going to be the best long term. So great. I’m also also a lawyer person, like we’ve been friends for a minute and nothing’s really bad. I haven’t I haven’t seen or heard anything on your end. Or you’ve been behind my back anything I’ve ever done to them, like, loyalty over time is also a factor. That also depends on what’s best long term because what relationships and friendships or they could be temporary or permanent. And I don’t think one is more than the other just different emotion. So as I said before, people go on like the spectrum but like, they can operate in the same wavelength. Another thing happens at the same level.

Simeon: All right. So you saying it kind of depends on Well, my answer is it depends on the person. Right, so I believe, cary on.

Zeke:Like a toxic relationship. I’m not sure if my friendship over there. But if my friend toxic Yeah. And I that’s like an obvious example, but like, if like my friends, business together, we like doing stuff like that. And like, this is like a well, like, beneficial, and the relationship is as like, somebody I’m cool with but like, I totally die for like, it’s just like, yeah, I’m gonna listen to it with this person. But like there’s nothing really like more than that is just like, okay, you might have to choose a friendship or like the greatest circumcising person. We hit together this person has my back no matter what and the relationship isn’t the friendship is more of like, a few every once in a while. Yes, a friend but like, we like hanging out all the time. We Australia even like freshly like, all the time, but like, there’s somebody just like, Yes, your friend. But we and that friend ain’t that close.

Simeon: Yeah, so my answer probably it depends on the person. Um, I my family person, right. But I’m not I’m not going to coach or flirt and play but I’m a fan. I’m a friendly person. Um, but I think but um, I like to let my girlfriend feel not welcome but I guess comfortable around my friends. Um, and if she doesn’t then you know, we’ll work that out when we make it when we get there. So around my boys think my girlfriend and my boys are cool. Like they’re five and other people that we have yet to see that but if I were to put my friends over Britney or Britney over my friends, I don’t know. Is it because I agree which I A friendship, like we’re not gonna see each other every day. Unless we’re in business, like, if I saw a business issue, then obviously gonna see you every damn day. If we’re not in a business, if we’re not in a business and you’re doing your own thing, I’m doing my own thing, then I’m gonna see my grow more often. Because I have a lot of more time away from you. What I put one over the other. I’m not gonna say anything. Because the argument is y’all put this y’all put this video up, and then we’re gonna be 1000 people hitting up my line, but yo is on your friend.

Zeke:I think it also says like nothing, it’s like a situational, but like, some says like, the situation doesn’t mean every single time you want to choose one or the other. Like, Tuesday manages your frame, like this integration is beneficial right now, that user will quit. But they’re like, I feel like your child being born to the girl over your friend who’s like, hey, guys, like another one my child to be born and want to have a relationship over for, like a lot of time to like, when she made a decision, I chose my friends over my relationship. That’s it every single time. I know, sometimes you got to choose one of the others, like, the sacrifice on both sides, as I make my case, they’re going back, I’m still an individual, I still have people in my life that’s outside of you. Okay, beside me, circling inside, taking that person away from there, they also have relationships, then that becomes a bar with views on this, how like, a lot of people get chatting like that on this isolated email. And this is the only person that definitely had to deal with ever they deal with to be with the fact that I actually like for anybody.

Simeon: I agree cuz I, um, you know, personally speaking. And like my boys, when I go out or something, I usually tell my girl like everything, Everywhere I go, I tell my girl, my young one, I’m this and I’m doing this. And I tell her to make her feel reassured. Recently, didn’t really talk to her a couple of days ago, I thought I was going out with a friend. And she was like, she felt some type of way. Well, we talked about it. So now now I know that even if she doesn’t know this person, I’m still gonna say I’m going out with my boy angel or Taj or Kareem or something, you know? So that even if you don’t know him, she knows who they are. No, it’s not just oh, I’m going to my friend, Matt vague. I know that so I’m alone now recently. Which is, you know, some people may look at that, like, well, it’s common sense, but sometimes, you know, common sense really not common. Um, but I agree with you. So everywhere I go, tell my girl young doing this at that. We’re third. I also tell her that hey, the boys and I are planning something we’re doing we have something planned that day to actually be like, oh, yeah, we supposed to go sightseeing or something. And I’m like, Oh, snap. We planned that. Like a month ago, didn’t we? I was like, Damn, so now I gotta tell the boys I can’t go because you know make prior arrangements. So if something like that ever happens choose I would In my opinion, I will choose the when you pie arrangement when you made first.

Zeke:Yeah, that makes more sense

Simeon: Right. And if it’s something special, like your anniversary date about giving birth birthday, anything we should go that should come over, you know hanging out with your boys. Because you can hang out your boys and can date a week and you want to play ball. We could play ball next week. This week, you know, ain’t gonna change. But you know, see a golf and especially my, my situation. It’s our drive like to go see your six, three hours like I got to wake up at four o’clock in the morning to get there. What? Seven, eight. So, yeah, that’s just my opinion on that. And we got two more questions. I was quick.

Zeke:I always choose myself first, just take care of myself.

Simeon: Something happen over there heard a siren.  I live right next to the firehouse  Oh, what borough do you live in? Brooklyn? 

Zeke:Brooklyn, Bed Stuy.

Simeon: Leicester. Jamaica queens.

Zeke:You got a far that’s a 40 that’s a $40 uber ride.

Simeon: Yeah, honestly. It was crazy. I was on my boys one day. Shout out to him boy dark he was in Far Rockaway boy. His over his nose lift over. was $137 to get from Manhattan we was at Empanada Mountains from Manhattan to Far Rockaway. 130 $137. I live in a plane ride to Miami. was about half that price, bro. Right. It’ll go to Miami and come back with the same price that takes him to go to Fort Rucker. Yeah,

Zeke:Yes.

Simeon: But next question. What’s a trill? what’s appropriate in a friendship? When you’re in a relationship? What can you say to your friends? That’s appropriate. When you are in a relationship with your girlfriend?

Zeke:Where the girls at yo, bring up the radar.

Simeon: So what you what you think? What can you say? that’s appropriate in a friendship. And for this for this purpose? We’re going to use a friendship with a girl. I use it for everything. Because that’s the most common issue. So you wish your girl best friend. Clean Slate to go best friend. What can you say to her? that’s appropriate. Because you’re in a relationship with teakwood can you flirt? Can you not? Can you say she was pretty? Not?

Zeke:I mean if you say she looks pretty? You would say something like, that’s like a basic compliment that says to anybody like hey, you look pretty look nice today. I mean, probably behind it. Like I said, somebody has nice sneakers. I didn’t mean I want their sneakers now. Well, I’m gonna go rob them like hey, what size you are

Simeon: Going to rob them.

Zeke:All I mean like hey, those my sneakers caught my eye they caught my attention. I wanted to let you know that and be on my day. All right. Well, they all good.

Simeon: What size you wear?  You wear a 7 nah I wear a 9. I know somebody who wears a 7.

Zeke:Like, they think I’ll make a presentation and be like, hey, like, I guess they’d be (inaudible) like oh, it’s actually that I maybe I might be something but also everybody has their um different threshold or what’s what’s on what they feel like because a lot of times we get stuck in our head stuck in our own truth is if somebody buys like, hey, this is what’s normal for us. And then somebody else’s like they have your own normal and do both right? Because everything is all about how you perceive things and how you react to things.

Simeon: I’m not mad I’m looking. I’m hearing you but I’m looking back at

Zeke:Yeah. Like I said, my friends pretty. That mean they look good. And yeah. Like a sense of like, oh well next relationship. It does all you have to do look, it gave me also a vibe. A lot of times I’ve talked about this, right. It’s like this is the vibe Just give me like Oh, I like the way the pressure is like negative nobody like that looks like energy. I guess.

Simeon: Um I agree. I agree. Um, this is something a lot of people. A lot of this is a common question that that’s appropriate. So say you have a girl best friend, and you have a girlfriend. what’s appropriate that you can say to the girl best friend that the girlfriend doesn’t take? Long way? For men who don’t know? So for men who don’t know the answer to this, just ask your girlfriend. I just asked her like, you know, I have a friend. Her name is Xbox. I’m not because I’m looking at Xbox right now. Just I said, her name is Xbox. Oh, wait, what am I doing? I forgot her name. His name is clean slash. My name is clean slate. Like, how do I how do I act like I don’t know what to say anymore because I’m in a relationship. And you go from which is totally healthy. Again. She doesn’t say you cut her off. But if she doesn’t tell you to cut her off, and she’ll tell you, you know, this than a third is appropriate. And for men who just you know, you don’t feel like I shouldn’t go off in one thing challenge of myself. Keep it PG 13. Right. Not ready to are. don’t flirt with her. You could give her a compliment. You say? Oh, I like that dress. That looks nice. No, it’s not bad. But try your best not to idolize her. Don’t try to put her above your girlfriend. Because that’s, it’s not useful. So that’s your that’s your friend. Right? I said no, for right. don’t flirt. That’s number one. don’t flirt at all. If she tries to flirt with you. No. skirt? No. Don’t mean I do want to.

Zeke:Just make sure.

Simeon: All right. Take it to HR. Yeah, that’s it. That’s basically it, guys. So just be careful what you say. You can say anything, but just be careful to say just make it PG 13.

Zeke:Or don’t become a hashtag you know.

Simeon: Yes, basically, man, just don’t flirt. No, I’m saying that and that she’s going to take you to a job or harassment or something? No, no, no, go Don’t go crazy. I’m not saying they might cause you to be in trouble. Just just be cautious of what you say. And impacts and may have. Yeah, but last question. I was trying to write slash question just now. It’s it’s a question like, everyone almost has. Um, what if? Because I wrote the question by just when I’m when I’m thinking about saying it doesn’t make sense. What if you like this girl? And you don’t know if she likes you back? You really kind of get her? You know, what do you do? That’s like, everyone’s question.

Zeke:On both sides.

Simeon: Yeah. Like it still as as a coin toss. If you like this person, and you, you don’t miss gaming. If you like this person, and you don’t know what to do to see if they like you back? No, you don’t. Any advice?

Zeke:I say just like try to gauge it. And I mean, like, don’t like force anything to see how they add value. Because they save with like woman to like walk heterosexuals like a woman on day will let you know why the actions are the exact way to get a target to get like get your space but not everybody’s like that. So I say let’s see how they say they comfortable with you as they all say like, if you ask something that I call like, does like I think I want to take a toll on you right in terms of like, I’ll be around don’t call them 24 seven. That’s creepy to say. People that I call. Oh, he said by the address itself. The house is like the theme of the thing No, I like that.

Simeon: Yeah.

Zeke:Sometimes I we both funny people. Like sometimes we just friendly? It just how old? Are you all were everywhere. They I’m actually (inaudible) with them. But that’s the outgoing person loud. Speaks to, everybody. Some people are reserved, but like, they said, my headphones, which you also. So a lot of people don’t do they don’t ask, Hey, that’s true. Do we have any say says I have feelings for you? And sometimes they might not. And you do that though with that, and then that’s the problem when people can’t deal with rejection. That’s the whole incel thing. That’s a whole nother issue, basically. And then we got though a deck, and now we got to be like, I am not a threat. And I walk on the street, right?

Simeon: Yeah, I agree. I agree. Um, my advice for this one is probably just continue to talk to this person um it, just continue to talk and eventually you guys will, you’ll know, what’s up?

Zeke:You might fall into a relationship just like, hey we been with each other son long, again. What are we?

Simeon: What are we is fine. Um, but yeah, that’s, I mean, you know, like, my girlfriend and I, so we just kept talking. And, and after that, you know, we just fine. Um, but for some people we want, my advice would be to act, towards continuing to ask them, if you can go out with them. You know, try to build friendship, and then keep going to try to build a relationship, right? Get to know them more. And get to know if this is something you really want to be in. Like, like, I know, you may like this person, you may look bad. And you’re like, Oh, I want to be with them. But like, do you really want to be with them? Like you maybe just want to, you know, for the one time and it might be boring? Yeah, you just like you just wasted time. Like, if you really want something serious? Or if you really want a relationship with substance, something serious. Somebody build your future. What? Then? Talk to them and know more about them. I get to know em.

Zeke:It’s okay. If they say no, to

Simeon: Move on.  This is like a million billions of people in this world. And when you find out

Zeke:8 billion people, you’re gonna find somebody else.

Simeon: Just just just talk to them. That’s pretty much it. Continue to talk, hang out with them go out. And then when you feel like you guys are on up at a point where you’re flirting, she’s flirting back. She feels comfortable around you. Then you ask. Hey, what are we not by? And you ask? You ask her, you know, hey, do you like me know? And swag like, Oh, yeah, maybe. Yeah, but yeah, but so then you then you continue relationship. So just for now, just keep working at it. Keep going. And then when you guys feel comfortable with and ask again as soon as I’m serious, if you just want to know one time and one time. Yeah, come on, be honest. Be like hey, yeah, I’d be awesome stuff. Like what do you really want? That? Yes, that’s it. That’s all the questions. I have some relationship

Zeke:(inaudible) I got one girl number. I was happy we may have just met at the party. Friday I’m looking you know, like you can tell. Right? I sometimes people think of visiting yourself with something that’s not there. Today wonderful that to be annoying that their own confirmation bias they be ignoring things. Ignoring the day that does it all fit in there. There’s

Simeon: Also sorry, go ahead.

Zeke:No, no, go ahead.

Simeon: No, I’d be like that. Um, I wanted to say that if You want to go to don’t like you don’t work? You know? I’m a very religious do so I believe that God probably didn’t make it work for a reason. Maybe she maybe she wasn’t the right one for you. And then you’ll find Mr. Right or Mr. Right? Later on alone. Yeah, right. Honestly. Keep moving. And if it doesn’t work, because I okay, that’s fine. Try to brush it off. And then focus on yourself right focus on career, your future. Your family if you have to. What do you want to do with your life? Right? And then once when you do that, like they will come to you. You’ll see girls coming and you’ll be like, I like to ask cool and then again, you’ll have a chance to go.

Zeke:One time this girl she shoved her whole arm into my chest. Okay.

Simeon: It’s trying to get at you. I found my show on if you guys can even see this. So it’s a picture of me like a

Zeke:Nice

Simeon: This is a first birthday. I was on our birthday you went out to a nice restaurant. I thought rich spend I spent I spent a um think $13 Yeah, honestly wrong. Yo kinetically bro is cheap. Bro. Cheap. It is cheap. It is cheap. I went to we went to Chick Fil A. I got a Chick Fil A meal for seven bucks. Oh, seven bucks. A trickling meal. I go to New York Chick Fil A but it’s like 12 11 we really

Zeke:A bout to go Amazon. Yeah. Jobs over there.

Simeon: Yes.

Zeke:(inaudible)

Simeon: About 10 years I might we might move out to Connecticut, who knows

Zeke:Two more things on my end. My mom always said well, like give us a my she’s a black woman on my essays like it was like I do always be political first. And then respect them more and then you can see in the in that topic to see if we can be around this person for like 10 minutes. you planning on moving up? Oh, definitely. I’m been trying to get a job.

Simeon: Nice. I’m talking about

Zeke:That, that depends on business. I will say I think I have a different places in different states. I can just move there. Or like have a place to stay there if I’m doing business. Okay. And another day for like relationships. I would say like Timothy have nothing to do. Tim Tim Tim Chantarangsu formally to formally Timothy Delaghetto how his organization allows him and his wife to be to be to live out their own persons, their own people. And now they don’t have to like they don’t rely on each other. Not like each other, like, deny each other all the time.

Simeon: Right. You have to you got to send me that guy’s name. No, no. Oh, oh, okay. All right, Timothy. Buddy had to delay. Delegate part. Wild n Out.

Zeke:Tim, Tim, Tim.

Simeon: That’s the name. Yeah. um Timothy Delaghetto. On all the time. I know. Some some. I know. (inaudible) I can’t say that (inaudible).

Zeke:When I’m doing the transcript, I’m a be like. This is why um his wife use it to Canada? So she moves into the states and everything I know does a long distance he said two years.

Simeon: Um, I read up on it. I don’t know.

Zeke:Just had his first daughter.

Simeon: Also so congrats to him. Yeah, I do have some advice for some guys out there just for now. Focus on yourself. You know? do worry Jim. Actually for guys and girls focus on yourself go to the gym. Try to build mental health you know, meditate. change what you eat.

Zeke:Get a coffee. Right? Sleep security

Simeon: Look good. Make sure your body is like again, your body is your holy temple, right? So take care of your body you only have one body you know I’m saying like, take care of your body. So you know eat good make I’m learning how to cook now. Which is nice. So I’m cooking like big mac and cheese. Oh girl, the guy and he started cooking okra. Yeah. Chicken beef chicken, I’m actually gonna learn how to make a honey glaze Solomon next week I post the stuff on my Snapchat or Instagram somewhere how to make Home Food instead of like buying and wasting money. So just like my advice to everybody out there guys and girls on the show to grow as individual try to you know, build yourself. Again, build your brand. Find out what you want to do in life. You know, if you want to help people, if you want to be a manager, if you want to be a business owner if you want to you know work in a medical field technology field, you know, whatever, just just study and then work your butt off to get there. Also look into stocks knows crazy. A lot of people a lot of people have been into stocks. I go on Instagram. And that’s all I see some everywhere all everyone is into stocks now is is crazy, because I like it because now the minorities my minority group is now learning about to me the stock market or trading and investing, which is actually good. She should have been doing for years now. I don’t know why. My boy Angel shouts Angel, I just said Oh, he he’s put me on to some some stocks. I mean, Kareem is going on to stocks. He also put me on to this thing called NBA top shot. I don’t know if you ever heard of that. It’s um, it’s like NBA highlights. And it has value to add money value, like monetary value to it. So like LeBron James is cards, by the way. So each card is NBA highlight. And each card has a value. So it’d be like LeBron James dunk. And that cost like, you know, $10,000 Yeah. You guys are starting to blow up. I didn’t. I didn’t know about this. And an agent told me about it and do some more research on my house and it’s interesting. And literally this morning I went on Snapchat, and I see on the right side It was like think $250,000 for a Janice dunk. I was like wait, I click it I was like oh is dang they stopped right? So it’s not a girl so you know everybody just get into stock skins investing get into if you’re an NBA NBA type shot. That’s pretty much it. Oh, also, sorry, I’ve been down for a minute, but I started this Instagram page by like three weeks ago, four weeks is called. It’s called inspire you today. Hopefully Putting the blinkers on and do something. I’m not really looking. Yeah, I’m not the focus of this Instagram page is not to make money and get my followers up to like 1 million is that is just to end inspire people and motivate people. Because I, you know, I lost a good friend. This this month, in the beginning of this month, I’m, like I grew up in, you know, I’ve known him since elementary school, when and after his death, like, that kind of kind of changed me for the better. And I’ve been eating better. I’ve been exercising at home. I’ve been focusing more on like investing and stuff. And also in my, my future, Amazon. I’m getting a car soon. So you see that my instagram and snapchat are all over. So that is death kind of inspired me to create, like a page every day on a post, like inspirational, quote, motivational quote, for people, you know, to get up in case you know, their dream, I realized that a lot of people out there are not motivated. They’re not really inspired to you know, get out of bed and go work. And that has some negative effects on their life. And, you know, they may be going through a lot of family issues, financial issues, emotional, mental, physical, they may go to a lot of stuff. So I just made this made this page to, like, help inspire them. And there’s a quote, that’s mine, like, I just made it up. It was like, I think it’s on a page, it’s, um, you see, if I remember my uncle, you go through things in life. Because you’re the only one equipped enough to handle it. So I go to my problems, because only I could solve my problems. Now, whether I want to or not, that’s up to me. But if somebody else is in my shoes, you know, what would they do? What they do probably do a better job, they probably won’t. But I know I’m in my shoes, and I’m the only one I saw my issues. So I have to work my butt off to do it. Some people are not motivated, and they don’t solve issues and they, you know, just let it arise. And some people, they, they are motivated to solve it. I forgot to have to put a coat on Sorry, I forgot maybe I’ll just let it pass and do it tomorrow. But a quote for today or quote for today, or probably I’ll post it tomorrow, by the way. it’s um it’s something I made up again. I make these things up. I’m in the shower, and I was asked to do with fear and limitless because my girl asked me she noticed that I’m not fearful anymore. Um, I think I’m fearful of is you know, Aussie guy is not knows that I’m really afraid of in this world. Yeah, I gotta say, Yeah. He’s my life in an instant, bro. jus.

Zeke:Um, oh, yeah.

Simeon: Um, yeah, it was, uh, it was, um, don’t live your life in fear. Because then you limit your capabilities to something or you limit your, your possibilities. Something like that. I think I’m after worded differently and posted. But there was something about don’t live in fear because you get to limit yourself. You’re fearful of giving presentations. And if you don’t give this certain presentation, you won’t be promoted as you know, CFO, or you’re scared to run track. And if you’re scared to run this track, and if you do on the track, you went to a gold medal. Alright. Your fear is like holding you back from being great. So that was that’s the purpose of that quote, but I have to post it. I totally forgot. I’ve been busy as soon as I woke up. cookin your stuff so I said I said Instagram and I give quotes i think i think that was it for me today the honest thing for about an hour and a half now yeah me babbling but I’m kind of looking into outlets to express you know things that a lot of people are going through and I wanted to get my opinion hopefully your hopes and my opinion on relationships and also motivation inspiration to get guys I’ve been out go work focus on your body yourself your mind and get out there and I’m gonna be out there Give me two weeks I’m being back in the park shoot me two weeks Can’t wait yeah, that’s pretty much it. I want to speak for today about music um I just think this topic was relationship and also at the end motivation slash inspiration. 

Zeke:Motivation is always gonna be something people need those things happen every day. Like it isn’t it is one of those statements That’s true. You gotta learn how to blow gold and some people just need some outside voice to hear it and sometimes maybe you suffer maybe somebody else’s you are now in relationships with humans or relationships or races all humans are human beings. We need those so yeah me maybe even not after anything I just know how people will know how to operate.

Zeke:That brings another episode of the Let’s Gather Podcast to a close. Again I like to thank my friend Simeon, for joining the podcast. For next week, I have my friend Digno to speak about teaching and growing up. I hope you continue to have a nice day and hope to see you there.

[Music]